All children are dreamers and inventors. And there is usually no harm from their fantasies. But there are cases when it is vital for parents to understand whether the child is telling the truth. And it’s not that hard.
We studied the practical developments of Lillian Glass, a psychologist and expert in the field of body language studies, who has been helping the FBI to expose intruders for many years. The most interesting thing is that in his book “The body language of liars”, a well—known expert claims that the signs that a person is lying are always the same – regardless of gender, nationality and age. The liar will definitely be given out by his own gestures and facial expressions.
Sign 1. The liar is static
The one who tells the truth unconsciously uses a lot of gestures. But the liar tries once again not to fidget, which, according to Glass, is a sign of a primitive “neurological struggle”, as he subconsciously prepares for a possible confrontation.
Therefore, if your restless child suddenly begins to behave “statically”, this is a sure sign that things are not right here.
Sign 2. Sudden movement of the head
Watch how the child reacts to a direct question “head-on”. If, before answering, he slightly tilts his head back, tilts it down or to the side, then it is quite possible that he is going to lie to you.
Sign 3. Touching the throat or mouth
These are very telling signals, according to Glass, proving that they are trying to deceive you. Moreover, touching the throat, as a rule, means that the interlocutor is nervous and feels insecure. If he touches his mouth every now and then or covers it with his hand, it means that he simply does not want to tell the truth.
Sign 4. The liar takes a timeout
Often, an adult will take a cup of coffee or dig into his things unnecessarily before starting to tell a lie. In this way, he buys time to think about his lies properly. The child, in fact, does the same: he can, for example, cough, ask for a glass of juice or bend down to tie his shoelaces.
Sign 5. The deceiver often turns something in his hands
Whether it’s a pencil, a piece of paper, a lock of hair or any other small object. However, as Glass notes, it is not always worth drawing far-reaching conclusions from this gesture: there are just nervous people who are used to relieving tension in this way. It is more likely that it is the hands that give out the liar in another case: if the child feels that you have seen through his deception, then he begins to get angry and poke his finger in your direction. This is a sure sign of insincerity.
Sign 6. The liar tries to abstract
An adult will “hide” behind his desk or “obscure” the monitor, the child also uses this technique — perhaps with the help of his favorite soft toy. Both adults and children, when they tell lies, often deviate from the interlocutor or hug themselves. Even during the conversation, the deceiver will try to stay away from you so as not to let you into his personal space.
Sign 7. The eyes give out everything
If the child does not look you in the eye, carefully looks away — there is a reason to be wary. But it also happens exactly the opposite — a more “advanced” liar can literally impose eye contact on you in order to confuse you. The deceiver will be given one nuance — he will try not to blink at the same time.
There are a few more psychological nuances:
- A liar usually literally drowns in details, trying to confuse and distract the interlocutor from the most important thing — his lies.
- The deceiver often “turns on the fool”, pretending that he does not understand what is being discussed at all.
- The liar adheres to the principle that the best defense is an attack, and begins to accuse everyone of all possible sins.
- When a person tells a lie, all his emotions are somewhat inhibited, since he, thinking about his own, does not follow the current conversation well.
Why children deceive their parents is a topic for a separate article. There is a “dreamer’s lie” when a child with a violent imagination and a strong intellect comes up with unusual details of his own life.
There is a lie out of politeness — when a child, protecting the feelings of adults, embellishes his own achievements or behavior.
Akin to this is a competitive lie: the child wants to stand out from his peers, thereby attracting the attention of loved ones. It is hardly worth condemning and “taking at your word” for this.
But there are other kinds of lies — for example, lies out of fear of punishment and lies out of self-interest. But this is an alarm bell, signaling that something has gone wrong in your relationship. But in order to analyze and correct this, any parent should first at least understand when his child is telling the truth and when he is cheating.Follow Us On Facebook InstagramTwitter